WTF
Cops Investigate ‘Armed Cat’ Holding a ‘Rifle’; Turns out to Be a Stick
“We live in such a dangerous society that we never know when terror will strike…” At least, that must be what Newport, Oregon police thought went through the mind of the concerned citizen who snapped the above photo when they took to Facebook apparently worried that a cat sniper with a rifle was stalking the…
Read MoreHere’s the Creepy New AI-Enhanced $15k Robot Tons of Lonely Dudes Are Going to Have Sex with Soon
“Hey baby… stare into my passionless, plastic, mechanized eyes…” People want to act like this will somehow be different from owning a slave and perhaps they are right… because the majority of slaves weren’t raped on a daily basis. Meet Harmony 2.0, the AI-enhanced sexbot coming soon to a lonely dude’s house near you. From…
Read MoreProject Bluebeam Practice? Breakaway Civilization Tech? What Are These Strange Things in the Sky?
Sure, the US Navy claims the last one is a missile launch that went wrong… But what explains the others? Do you know what we’re looking at here? P.S. – And no, number three is not a “sundog”… even NASA admits they have no idea what it is. Delivered by The Daily Sheeple We encourage…
Read MoreScientists Try to Teach AI to Create Children’s Book Art — AI Creates an Apocalyptic Nightmare from Hell Instead
Well, this is certainly comforting (in much the same way getting a hug from a rabid, starving polar bear would be considered “comforting”). A team of scientists attempted to train a deep learning algorithm to recognize illustrations from thousands of pages of children’s books including those by authors Dr. Seuss, Marc Brown, and Maurice Sendak.…
Read MoreSenator Introduces Bill to Ban Publicly Funded Expeditions in Search of Bigfoot, Leprechauns, or the Abominable Snowman
You probably thought New Mexico wouldn’t need an actual bill to specifically ban this. Well, then you would be wrong. Apparently public funds have been expended for college professors to take class trips in search of Bigfoot in New Mexico. To stop this practice, Senator George Munoz has sponsored a bill to ban public funds…
Read MoreThis Crime Is So Gross, The Article About It Should Come with a Free Lobotomy So You Can Unknow It
Disclaimer: This story does not come with a free lobotomy. Read at your own risk because — This is 28-year-old Timothy Blake: He is suspected of going around to various Marietta City, Ohio shopping malls, masturbating in the parking lots, filling up syringes with his semen, then walking around the malls and randomly squirting various…
Read MoreSurveillance Cam Catches Women Fending Off Adult Toy Store Robber With, What Else? Adult Toys
Stop me if you’ve heard this one… So, a wannabe robber with an obviously fake gun walks into an adult toy store… Oh wait, that’s not even a joke. It actually happened. A man decided it would be a good idea to rob a sex shop in San Bernardino with a fake gun. Once the…
Read MoreWife Tricks Husband Into Thinking She Brought a Wild Coyote Home… He Completely Loses It
What would you do if your wife sent you a photo text with a picture of a small coyote snuggled up on the couch next to your son and asked “Can we keep him”? This is what happens when you combine boredom with Photoshop (and possibly some sort of deep seated, subconscious karmic revenge): Delivered…
Read MoreWife Tricks Husband Into Thinking She Brought a Wild Coyote Home… He Completely Loses It
What would you do if your wife sent you a photo text with a picture of a small coyote snuggled up on the couch next to your son and asked “Can we keep him”? This is what happens when you combine boredom with Photoshop (and possibly some sort of deep seated, subconscious karmic revenge): Delivered…
Read MoreCops Set Up Surveillance Cameras After Mountain Lion Reports, Catch This Crazy Sh*t on Tape Instead
Wow, so, this is probably the last thing police (or anyone, anywhere) expected to catch on tape. After reports of a mountain lion prowling around Celebration Park in Gardner, Kansas (town population: 19,123), cops at the Gardner Police Department set up surveillance cameras overnight in the hopes they would catch the potentially dangerous animal on…
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